Welcome to your Post Reality Check Love work Action Items:
Let’s continue here to complete the important follow up love work that will change your trajectory and put the past where it belongs–in the past, as outlined below.
Remember the Reality Check and Bye Bye Blindspots session ties everything together and allows us to discover what your Disempowering Story is (aka, your Blindspot) from the past that has been dictating the present and closing off your future–your dreams.
Your “story” about yourself was never true! It was a defense mechanism to protect yourself.
Love work Action Items:
- Write a Get Complete, Free & Real “Clarity Declaration” (click here to download the worksheet) to Get Complete with your Childhood Relationship with your parents (or anyone else who didn’t meet your needs or even hurt you) so you can be here now ready for your soulmate.
Note: Be sure to download and save the worksheet to your computer since it’s fillable and you’ll want to save your answers.Get Complete from the Childhood relationship to your parents where your needs were not met. Do this as an advocate for your Inner Child. Imagine that you’re a social worker representing your Inner Child. There is no judgment.
First step: Acknowledge that your parents gave you life and that the rest was a bonus. Be grateful that you are here. The fact that your needs were not met had nothing to do with you. So now you take responsibility for your life. If you experienced a great deal of trauma, we are not saying that what happened was okay. You are acknowledging and choosing to move on from it.Second step is to write the following:
- What didn’t work in your childhood. Identify and make a list of all the things that were missing for you in your childhood. The pain, the disappointments, the challenges. Don’t hold back.
(Make a list) - How you felt. For each item that didn’t work, write down how it felt emotionally to not receive what you needed and wanted.
- How you wanted to feel. Then, write down what you wished you received in the relationship and how you wanted to feel instead of how you actually felt.
- Why you really need whatever was missing. Your feelings matter, what you want matters. Write down specifically why you want and need what was missing.
For example:
- What didn’t work for me was how you were not there for me when I was growing up since you were always working.
- It made me feel unloved, abandoned, misunderstood, hurt, confused and alone.
- What I needed and wanted was your presence, your love, your time, and to feel important to you like I mattered.
- I needed that because I was a child who needed her father.Do this for each aspect of your childhood that was challenging, painful or missing. Now is the time to express any emotions you feel your parents without judgement. Lay it on the line. This is for you to gain clarity and heal yourself so you can step into a healthy, loving and connected lifetime partnership. This document and this experience is for you only.
- Third Step: Next, sit with the feelings associated with what was missing. Really see it and start absorbing the new healthy perspective that you are an adult now. That a part of you was still hurt and wounded and you’re honoring yourself and your needs. Imagine closure from being stuck in this old paradigm. Imagine freedom from being stuck in the past and wondering and questioning your choices and acceptance that you did the best you could, forgiveness for any judgement, regret, upset and criticism of yourself, and love for the human being that you are.
- Fourth Step: Visualize the door to your childhood traumas and your parent/child relationship with your parents closing. Get connected to yourself and your freedom as an adult to create your life and move forward. Realize how unproductive it is for you as an adult to be suffering over your childhood that is long past and not happening now. Instead of the wounds and low vibration, I want you to visualize beautiful, new, open and healthy space in your heart and your life to welcome healthy love with the one who is waiting for you now!
- Fifth step: End the document and release it and yourself! There’s no need to discuss this with your parents or anyone else. And if you do, please know that you’re not necessarily going to get agreement or satisfaction from anyone else. This is for you to heal yourself and step into your wholeness.
3. Write a letter to forgive yourself.
Forgive yourself for times you’ve been critical or hard on yourself. Remember it’s a journey and you did the best you could with the tools you had. Easy does it.